Monday, January 18, 2010

Turning 30

Sorry I've been a little absent. School has started back up and I'm already a week behind! I'm taking four English classes and a psychology lab. The English classes mean I have to read twelve novels and countless works out of various anthologies! Needless to say I'm a little overwhelmed.

But, that's not what this post is about. I'm turning 30 this year! That exclamation point at the end there means that I'm excited about it. I wasn't excited about it a few months ago. I haven't been excited about it since I turned 29, but I'm excited now. My life is completely insane right now, but I really can't complain. I've made more strides toward the life I want since getting laid off almost a year ago than I ever would have if that hadn't happened. Going back to school to finish the degree I started in 1997 was the fist step toward becoming who I really want to be, and things have just been falling into line ever since. Joining Weight Watchers was another huge step, which led me to meeting my friend Diane who is teaching a writing class which I will be taking and who has pushed me to start becoming the runner I always dreamed of being. I've wanted to write my whole life, and haven't done it for a very long time. I'm not sure why, just afraid I guess. Afraid that whatever came out would suck. But now I don't care!

That's another big thing that's happened recently...I've realized I don't give a damn! I used to worry constantly about what others thought of me. If someone was talking quietly near me, I thought they were talking about me. If someone was the slightest bit off when talking to me I thought it was the end of the world. But, now I just don't care! This could have something to do with getting older (or my happy pills) but it's happened and I'm glad! I truly am happier than I've ever been in my life and while there are things that I'd like to change, for the first time in a long time I feel unstoppable! I feel like anything I want is within reach and that turning 30 is going to be spectacular!

1 comment:

  1. You know, that's what I love about being in my 40's... I just don't care what people think anymore. That sort of freedom comes with age and life experience, I think. And it's a GOOD thing!! So bring on 30! :)